Hotel Artemis (4/5)

"Good for you" :) Idiots. This guy deserves better partners. Everyone is on the penthouse? Are all the other floors filled with concrete? This is gonna be a cool print. Nice steampunk vibe, especially the thick wires across the doors. I like the music. "More of a cat person" :) I'm expecting it will pay to be the only nice guest. Private water?!?! Are you @%#$^#$ kidding me! What... what the hell is that? Is that different than all the bottled water I have to buy? "I highly doubt you are au pair" :) That is f-n gross. She is a true professional. She did it fast. Printer jam :) Put the windows up! You're in a riot man! I guess the orderly is any at Spock because he is a d!c$. How did this movie only bring in $12 million?!

Planet of the Sharks (/5)

A much cleaner version of that place in Water World. No binoculars or scopes survived? ... Oh. Where are the defenses? How about an alarm bell? Or do the Sharks react to noise? ... Oh... Not very loud? Was there a noise level restriction on set? What about some dolphin decoys to float on the surface? Why is there an empty barrel in the way? This place is doing my check better. 6 minutes in and a second reference to home brew. Either this world is full of software engineers or they are drunks. Boat man has the Costner hair style of Water World but at a fraction of the price. A bow tie? What the hell kind of accent is that? Don’t lead then back! Some of the best minds (of the 500 or so people left) on the planet. “Deep Six” it. Some nice forced “natural” slang. This is a ludicrous shark hunt dance. I expected more shark hunters. Those are tiny sharks. And why are you wasting the resources? When they docked I was gonna say something about theft but I figured in this world you were likely safe. How is he gonna catch up to a motor boat? Hold him up and I’m sure he’ll be killed by a flying shark. They’re protecting her. I can easier read an ultrasound that these quick flashes of these horrible soar readings. It is obviously a staple of shark movies that people above the water have incredible shark vision to see sharks underwater. I suppose those with the mutant gene for this are the ones that survived this far. The pilot likes to crew gum. Way to repeat the instructions to save writing. Don’t get too close... Oh. Stop yelling! No one knows what vehicle he is talking about until we finally see it?! Hey! You said you ha e Nicole’s risking it all to draw THEM in. This is the first time have mentioned THEM to the science people!!! That exactly waist I was thinking when he punched the roof. Years ago I would have watched this on a lame Saturday night. Sexy Unix talk unseen since Jurassic Park. They didn’t “waste” money on a Go Pro. Hey! Gumdrop iMacs! Suddenly yell boy is concerned with other people. I imagine a shark will reappear at some point. This movie is just long enough to fill 2 hours of network time. Horrible pressure acting yell boy. What is with the close up shots of hands turning the wheel ? Again? With all these sharks why does not one swim with urgency half the time?! Clearly no keyboard cleaner in this world. Can they drop the formality of “sir”? What is this katana crap?! I hope there are no space sharks. Black blood? I’m sure those buildings smell great. Comedy? This movie is not funny.

The First Purge (3/5)

They're gonna target you with a bonus protest leader. This new Skeletor is far more scary than the original. For someone who doesn't wear contacts he put those in like a pro... I pshaw your "realism". We are all Staten Islanders tonight... Come on! Are you waiting to kill or be killed. Now I want to purge you. Maybe he'll be trapped in the elevator for 12 hours. Did the NFFA provide those flaming street barrels too? "For our country (touch)"... What a creep. Ironically questionable neighborhoods already have bars. I suspect an assassination... queens? The middle of the street on purge night is not the place or the time to have this conversation. These two have seen Black Panther too many times with the handshake :) Are they ashamed? ... They don't want repercussions after the purge! You burn the church and you'll get some people angry. NFFA had some white supremacists in their back pocket... What a surprise. Way to tip your hand you smooth faced creep. Where the 3 at? If you want footage to disappear you should do all that work of pressing delete yourself. The door is clearly unlocked. I haven't forgotten about Skeletor. No way I want to be the dude carrying the battering ram. I think the closet might be occupied? They're playing basketball?!?!??! That is the most shocking!

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